BREAKING NEWS: Alun Wyn Jones Has His Own Website

Upon discovering alunwynjones.com, I thought I should do the responsible thing and give him some free advertising.

From the looks of things it seems pretty new, there isn't much on there, and it only shows up on the second page of google search results for Alun Wyn Jones- oh wow, just outed myself
didn't, I?

...

ANYWAY, I'm like 100% sure that AWJ has a hand in his website unlike other athlete's websites where they pay a person/people to pose as them, how can I be so sure well, check out the bio section:

Alun-Wyn Jones has an affinity with the letter "L": - He is studying to be a Lawyer at Swansea University, he is a Lock forward and a Leader of his country with tenacity and drive to be the best.

He wrote that! Honestly! Remember when he was a 'work horse'(2:11):



What the hell is that? He neighed! I can't even bring myself to watch that clip, I get so much second hand embarrassment. He sooo wrote that thinking it was so witty, and funny, and cool! When really its- *ahem* Oh Alun on with the dad jokes, already and you're only 24!

On the blog there is information we already know and pictures we've already seen (conspicuously missing is his Lions head shot, which I believe documents his best hair cut!) but isn't it exciting knowing the 'work horse' is behind it? Now I know what my new homepage is going to be...

Obligatory AWJ Photo:


gets me everytime!

There is nothing wrong with your monitor. Do not attempt to adjust the picture

Um. So.

I recently activated that google analytics thing, that allows you to see how many people visit your site, where they come from, how they are referred here, which pages are most popular etc. I'm actually kind of shocked at how much traffic my blog(s) get. I was under the impression that like 4 people saw my blog(s) within a month, and the people that did see them only stayed for about 5 seconds. However it has been made clear that's not the case at all.

While I'm pleasantly surprised I'm also feeling a little self conscious because I kind of seem, bat shit crazy when I compose my posts(all in good fun right?), I mean the things I come up with; the insight I pretend to have; the perving I do, srsly what the hell?

Don't get me wrong, I'm well aware that its all google.com's doing and not my 'wit' or the 'interesting' content I write about, or even my catchy name, no! What brings most of you to my blog is what I do on my blog: psychotic fan girling.

Top Ten Death of Trend Posts (and reasoning behind them):

10)
What: August 1st 2007 Archive
Why: Sidney Crosby and Vinny Lecavalier. Puck Bunnies!

9)
What: Because I'm Obsessed
Why: Danny Cipriani and Dominc Waldouck

8)
What: February 1st 2008 Archive
Why: Because of KOL fan girls obsession with Lily Aldridge, don't deny it!

7)
What: September 1st 2009 Archive
Why: I guess its because I started harping on KOL about OBTN and how it just wasn't a quality record. Do you share my sentiment?

6)
What: There goes my credit card bill
Why: My best guess is because more and more girls are finding out about Roxy's online store, something that is still relatively new and both a blessing and a curse for those of us who love Roxy's stuff

5)
What: June 1st 2008 Archive
Why: KOL. NHL. and fashion

4)
What: Death of a Trend
Why: Because people enter in 'Hummus' in the google search bar and are somehow brought to my blog.

3)
What: Nathan Followill and Liv Tyler
Why: Nathan's bulge brings all the girls to the yard. Damn, right its better than yours.

2)
What: May 1st 2008 Archive
Why: My crazy ramblings about skynet and the NHL...errrrr...moving on.

and the number one post is.........................


1)
What: I heart Caleb Followill MGMT
Why: Because you wishful thinking fan girls are waiting for the day when Caleb breaks up with his girlfriend and when you type 'Caleb Followoll breaks up with Lily Aldridge' into google, you actually get my crazy fan girl rant of me 'taking a break' from mine and Caleb's imaginary relationship. LMAO. Oh you guys.

So the reason why most of you visit Death of a Trend is because of Kings of Leon, which is kind of funny since I hardily ever listen to them anymore. I've moved on. Maybe you should too. So they can take the hint and make great records again.

ahem.

Keyboard Cat Takes it Away

LOL Photo of the Day: Batman and Robin

This photo never fails to amuse. Look how tiny Shane Williams looks compared to Jamie Roberts. How adorable! And yes Jamie looks just like Batman, and Shane could totally be his Robin 'cause he's so small. Tnaww Jamie could put him in is pocket!

O RLY

That homewrecking model may have stolen my husband, watered down his music, and be...you know, a model HOWEVER we have discovered something from her past that makes all of that inconsequential. Like if we ever get into a screaming match about how he never sees his kids because of her I'll just throw out the fact THAT SHE WAS IN A LIMP BIZKIT VIDEO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (the 2:37 mark to be exact!)



OH SNAP!

Sorry to torture you with rap rock but people, how amazing is this? Don't you feel some kind of superirority over her now? No matter that she's gorgeous, a size zero, and boinking our soon-to-be ex-husband, she was in a Limp Bizkit video, which is an automatic fail in all aspects of her life.

Hey if that's what Caleb wants to associate with well then, we're better off without him!

...MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

sorry gotta go, Tom [Croft] needs a back rub ;)

Somewhere Dominic Waldouck is Losing His Shit

After months of being branded a 'home wrecking whore' my pretend best friend, Sienna Miller, has split with Balthazar Getty.

Shocking, I know!

You know Dom, is hobbling his way to Heathrow right now, trying to catch a flight to Hollywood, in the hopes of getting some rebound action. I may like Sienna and all but she doesn't have the best judgment in matters of the heart...or dick.


I'd say Dominic's chances right now are pretty damn good. Get on that plane, boy! Then get on that girl!


I am so bad!

Pretend Boyfriends are the Best!

Apparently, my new boyfriend, Dominic Waldouck's, perfect woman is Sienna Miller. Now I like Sienna Miller, I think she's hot; I like how she dances to the beat of her own drum, and I like the fact that she was born a hot mess BUT finding this out is like finding out that they guy you've been crushing on, has just revealed to you that he likes your best friend.



Its happened to me on more than one occasion and on everyone of those occasions, my bff discovers that she likes him too, and then I have to stand against the wall and watch my best friend and the boy I've been fantasizing over for weeks, dance, drink, flirt, and make sexual advances towards each other, all.night.long.

It hurts, and you want to hate the bitch but you can't because she stayed on the phone with you for hours while you teen agnsted it out because your parents ~*just don't understand me*~, and you've had endless sleepovers, where you got drunk/high, and shit talked the night away. And you want to hate that prick but you can't because he made you laugh, and drove you home so you wouldn't have to take a cab. So you just stand there, hurt, angry, sad and frustrated that all these emotions can't be expressed, can't be verbalized because if you did, it would hurt two of the people you loved most.

And then you make batches and batches of cupcakes, to eat your pain away...


But I digress this will never happen with Sienna and Dominic. Why? Well Sienna may be Dominic's type but Dominic is not Sienna's type.

Sienna's type are what I (and Arnold) would call girly men. They are effeminate, pretentious, OLDER, and are, a touch crazy. They wear scarves, drink lattes, are 'artists', and probably cry after sex. Methinks that none of what I just described applies to Dominic. So I'm safe. We're safe!



Having pretend boyfriends are amazing, I know it might seem crazy but, with real boyfriends, could you go out get drunk, dance/flirt/make out with any guy you choose?

NO, no you can't, but I can! Why? because I have pretend boyfriends and I can do as I please, when I please, without having to waste my youth on some guy that just wants to 'get down' and then get moody and mad at me for reasons unknown, pfffttt I don't need that shit!

I'm young, I'm unattached, and I'm going to flirt with every good looking boy that comes my way! Plus pretend boyfriends come in handy when undesirables catch your scent, its easier to lie if the lie is half written with the truth: "Oh I have a boyfriend. He plays rugby. Yea he's big and muscular. We're really in love. Yea..."

AMAZING!

Get in line Maxime Talbot!!!

This video of husband no. 7 has been making the rounds and already has 11,000 plus hits on youtube and everyone's going nuts over the fact that Sidney's singing some r&b song (at least we can be thankful that its not Nickleback). I mean that's all good and well but how come no one has noticed Maxime Talbot's comments about Crosby's lip's and ass, more specifically how 'big they are'.



If that's not a declaration of love and desire I don't know what is. I mean when a guy usually makes remarks about someone's ass and lips it usually means they want to get down with said person; gay, straight, whatever. I mean, it wouldn't be that much of a stretch seeing as how they already take showers together, and possibly even sleep in the same room as each other, its not impossible to suppose a torrid love affair...But then again Sidney Crosby's too boring for something that scandalous to happen...and he's straight...and I guess Talbot's straight too...

BOO!

Best.Photo.EVER.

Heidi, doesn't look that bad here...almost pretty but she'll never be as pretty as she used to be:

I miss this Heidi...as much as I can miss a person whom I've never met, lol.

File This One Under: Random

I don't watch MuchMusic anymore because of the MTV rip-off shows they like to produce (see: the totally untrue history of...), the fact that I think I'm 5 years off of their target audience (13-15 yr olds), the fact that MTV Canada is a bajillion times better, AND because of the annoying slags they like to hire. But last night was the MuchMusic Video Awards, originally I wasn't going to watch it, because the MMVAs are quiet lame and embarrassing (I mean, the middle aged crisis on the block preformed...really, now!) But then I heard that Jason Spezza was going to be there and since the season's over anything slightly hockey related I will devour without a second thought!


Ok so they invited Jason Spezza...Jason Spezza guys! Of all the hockey players they could choose from, they chose Jason Spezza. Despite his hockey skillzzzz Spizza boy is a dork, a HUGE dork, his voice sounds like to should belong to a guy who gets excited about Battlestar Galactica Fanfic. Plus he was soooo awkward last night, I felt kind of bad for him.

C'mon MuchMusic, Jason Spezza? Jason Spezza? Why not Brooks Laich? I doubt he was busy PLUS he's hot AND charismatic. CLEARLY MuchMusic has jumped the shark...how tragic!

BTW: I loved it when Sarah asked him who he wanted to go home with tonight, he said no one because he's taken, and she fully told him "I don't believe that", HAAAAAAA!!!!!

BREAKING NEWS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wikipedia actually has an entry on Chavs... and places of higher education don't recognize Wikipedia as a reliable/valid source???? PUH-LEEZE!

But srsly, all I have to say is: L.O.L.


More examples of Chavs:










Lovely, aren't they?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Why, Rick, WHY????

----->Click Here For Mega Empathetic Embarrassment<-------

Its not as bad as the penguins' car dealership commercial but dude its still a car dealership commercial!!!!!! Don't you know you deserve better than this! An Armani Prive commerical; A Burberry commericial; an LG phone commerical; hell even a Gatorade commercial would be better than this!!!!! You're a superstar! You should command better commercials!!!


Somewhere in New York Sidney Crosby is laughing giggling his ass off right now


...whatever you're still hot as hell AND you're on the Team Canada with Dany Heatley (and some other dudes)! Two husbands, one shower, OH BOY!

For the record: He didn't do that badly in the commercial, am I wrong???

Sidney Crosby: Mother-in-law approved

Dear Sidney Crosby,

My mum (your mother-in-law) said during the anthems tonight: "you know what? he's not just a hockey player he's a very handsome young man", CLEARLY I concurred! You're smoking hot! You know that you're hot (in theory anyways) but DUDE you're awkward is hell and can't dress for shit! I love you and everything, you're my fifth husband but DUDE you are the most awkward person in history.

I've been spending a lot of time with Rick Nash lately, and he's just like so chill, and so cool. Since Columbus didn't make the playoffs, he's been taking me out to dinner and stuff, and he's just so funny, and cute but in like a really hot way...ya know? Anyways he's waiting for me, he's arranged this romantic skyline dinner downtown, ugh how sweet, I'll talk to you soon!



Love,
Nicole

PS yey you won tonight!!!! And tell Jordo to score already!!!!!!!!

Hockey Movies: Airborne (1993)

Cast:
Shane McDermott as Mitchell Goosen
Seth Green as Wiley
Brittany Powell as Nikki
Chris Conrad as Jack
Jack Black as Augie


IMDB says:

"Mitchell Goosen is sixteen/seventeen year old kid from California who loves to surf and roller blade. Yet, his parents, who are two zoologists were given a grant to work in Australia. The only problem was: Mitchell couldn't go with them. So, he gets sent to stay with his aunt, uncle, and cousin in Cincinnati, Ohio. When he arrives, he meets his cousin who is also his new roommate for the next six months: Wiley. Mitchell then goes to school and gets on the bad side the high school hockey players. Mitchell and Wiley end up enduring weeks of torture from the guys. Then, the big guys and Mitchell and Wiley have to learn to get along to try to beat the Central High School rivals in a competition down Devil's Backbone."


Ok so its not exactly a hockey movie, but there is hockey in the movie, and hockey players AND it has the oldest hockey story of all time: The poor kids vs. the rich bitches. Except in this movie, the boys take to the streets to battle AKA a lame Rollerblade race down devil's back bone that apparently runs the entire breadth of Cincinnati,who knew? Why is this a good hockey movie? Well not only does it combine two of the greatest sports ever (hockey and surfing) it features a young Jack Black AND Chris Conrad, I had the hugest crush on him for like a decade!



Weak Ponits:
-Dialogue
-Plot
-Plot Development
-Too much cheese
-Seth Green
-Seth Green's flat ironed hair
-Soundtrack
-The lack of hockey



Strong Points:
-Chris Conrad
-The Hispanic gangster dude being on the hockey team!
-The endless inside jokes I have, that have come from this movie
-Pepe the shark
-How ridiculous Mitchell is/was
-How ridiculous the clothes were at the time and omg I totally wore pants like that...anyways, heh

Would I recommend it?
This is the type of movie you watch on a Saturday afternoon, whilst still in your pajamas. Its fun its ridiculous! If you're looking for a movie that's mildly entertaining that doesn't require any brain cells to enjoy, well then this movie is for you!

PS I LOVE this movie...wow what does that say about me

Celebrity Playlists, ITS WAR: Me VS. Cam Ward

I only have one reason for disliking Cam[eron] Ward, and its a damn good reason! Anyone would agree...well anyone outside of Alberta (oh snap!)

I was browsing iTunes' celebrity playlists and they had a bunch of playlists from hockey players, I could hate on Ryan Miller some more because he actually states that Poison has some good songs (really??? what fucked up universe does Miller come from?) but I decided on Cam[eron] Ward because even though they both openly state that they like Nickelback, Cam[eron] Ward is better looking than Ryan Miller and I'd rather have Ward's pic on my blog than Miller's, truth be told!

What????? Miller's face is TOOOOOOTALLY lopsided...hey this blog is meant to be judgmental and superficial, so don't hate!

Cam[eron] Ward's Celebrity Playlist:



1)Fix you-Coldplay
Cam[eron] says: I like how it starts mellow and then the guitar solo takes over
I say: Oh, we know how I feel about this song!

2)Oh be joyful-Matthew Good
Cam[eron] says: It' a very upbeat song
I say: I can't argue with Matt Good, he's like a god to me but srsly Cam[eron] couldn't you come up with a better justification than that?!?!?!?!

3)Over my head-The Fray
Cam[eron] says: no explanation given
I say: I don't think I've ever met someone who actually likes The Fray

4)Move along-All American Rejects
Cam[eron] says: More recent, new flavour
I say: Cam[eron] is a real Shakespeare, eh? Nice explanation, dude! PS I can't hate All American Rejects are like a HUGE guilty pleasure of mine!

5)Point to Proove-Theory of a Dead Man
Cam[eron] says: I like the heavy guitar and the singer's voice
I say: Oh you mean Theory of a Nickel Creed??? NOW this I can hate on. This band is so bad! They had to show up on a Much Music reality television show just to get some press...with that said I'd totally 'get down' with the lead singer in a heartbeat!
6)Everlong-Foo Fighters
Cam[eron] says: I like the intro that carries over into the song
I say: I'm not going to lie, I love this song!
7)Rockstar-Nickleback
Cam[eron] says: Nickelback is one of my favourite bands
I say: This is the reason why I cannot like Cam[eron] Ward; he openly admits to liking Nickelback. Wayne Gretzky is also on my blacklist because he appeared in this very video! WOW I think I've solved the great mystery that is, 'who are Nickleback's fans?': Hockey players and Albertans.

8)The Rising-Bruce Springsteen
Cam[eron] says: no explanation given
I say: I LOVE The Boss, good job Cam[eron]!

9)Galvanize-Chemical Brothers
Cam[eron] says: I like the beats and bass
I say: I'm pretty sure Cam[eron] likes this song, not because he's a fan of electronica/trip hop/big beat, but because every single frickin' arena plays Galvanize in between plays! Don't believe me? For proof CLICK HERE!

10)The Hand That Feeds-Nine Inch Nails
Cam[eron] says: I like the guitar solos during the song
I say: Again, my skepticism kicks in, and I'm like 100% sure that Cam[eron] just heard this song on the radio and decided that he liked it, not that there's anything wrong with that, I'm just saying, Cam[eron] isn't an NIN fan, ya know?

11)Because of you-Nickelback
Cam[eron] says: heavy guitar that gets you fired up
I say: Surprise, surprise, Nickelback makes another appearance. When I first heard this song, it made me laugh...its that bad!

The Verdict: Cam[eron] Ward's musical taste isn't entirely unfortunate BUT the fact that Nickelback is mentioned not once but TWICE and the fact that he openly laments that Nickelback is one of his favourite bands, Cam[eron], your Playlist sucks!!!!!!!

PS I think you also need to take a creative writing class in the off-season, I know Hockey players aren't exactly the brightest of the bunch but come on dude, this is the best you can do???? Maybe I just expect too much from you guys...

Shut up and smile 'cause you just cut into me

Mike Comrie gets to tap that...and no one is jealous

L.O.L. @ the New York Rangers' site, featuring the Rangers/Islanders rivalry, sticking it to Comrie for dating Hilary Duff. The caption for one of the pictures says:

'Rangers goaltender Henrik Lundqvist denies a shot by Hilary Duff's boyfriend, Mike Comrie'


LOVE IT!!!!!!!!

Unless you're an idiot, or a twat, then you would have noticed that's a jab at Comrie, as if to say "you're dating her ??? really???...AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!"

Srsly, is there anything more pansy ass than dating Hilary Duff? Look at Aaron Carter and Joel Madden, do they scare you? Do they strike you as the type that could fuck your shit up? NO! because they both dated Hilary Duff! You can't be that badass if the Duff makes you carry her low fat vanilla latte from Starbucks. Sure she's pretty but she ain't hot. Try as she might, she just isn't sexy, nor is she very interesting. Plus Miley Cyrus is totally usurping her throne of tween queen; no doubt she will surpass the Duff's accomplishments! How do I know? Well, was Hilary ever invited to the Oscars???? EXACTLY!!!

See what I mean when I say hockey players get shafted! Even their celebrity conquests are lame!


Poor Hilary, she will always be Lizzie McGuire...

I heart Caleb Followill MGMT

Since Caleb has decided he's going to cheat on me, I've decided we should separate for a while, you know evaluate our relationship a little. I knew he'd be a challenge, he'd make me cry, he'd break my heart over and over again, but still I chose to be with him because he's uber talented, fucking beautiful, and a tortured soul, plus he writes me SUCH beautiful songs!!!

Tell me could you look into his green eyes and say no??? do you have some superhuman iron will??? I highly doubt that, so don't judge me!


Anyways someone has to fill my rock n' roll void and I nominate Andrew Van Wyngarden from MGMT, why? Well he's really pretty, and his music is what acid should be like, and he's got great hair, and he's in a band and he's really pretty!

So until Caleb some how comes up with a plan to win me back, Andrew darling, you're taking his place!!!!

Blasphemy

Lost boys 2? Lost boys TWO???? WTF!!!

Just because you don't have a job, Mr. Cory Feldman, doesn't mean that the memory of the movie that made me realize I was a girl (a al Jason Patric), should be pissed on. Fuck you, man! FUCK YOU!!!!


PS this is going straight to video, you do realize that right?

Velvet Painting???

OK, so:



what -- what is this? Srsly, NOT ATTRACTIVE!!!!! At. All. Who approved this cover??? ESPN srsly needs a male Anna Wintour ASAP because this just ain't cutting it!

I love how awkward he looks (as per usual); he has NO idea what to do with that hat. Oh Sidney Crosby, never suave, never cool, forever awkward, forever Sears catalogue. This is the face of hockey, ladies and gentlemen.



PS LOVE the hair on his arms...what? I like hair, sue me!

THAT'S FIERCE!!!!

Who is this man, and where has he been all of my life????




HOT MESS