Update

I just wanted to let you know that my blog list of 'Relevant Sources' has been updated.

Firstly I have added Manpilez to the list, a group of lovely ladies who do actual reporting with healthy amounts of squeeing. Did I mention they often snag interviews with fan favourite players??? If you don't already read Manpilez you should, you really really should! These ladies know what they're talking about AND are totally awesome! Check them out already!

Secondly I've added Go Hard Or Go Home which is a new blog written by a long time reader of Death of a Trend, Maddie. She's an Irish rugby fan so its safe to say there will be plenty of entries on the boys from the Emerald Isle! Please visit her and send some love :D

And now for no reason at all A JORDAN STAAL VIDEO

Sidney Crosby and Co at Cannes

I have no clue what the boys are doing in Cannes but I do, however, applaud Sidney Crosby for walking away from his fishing rod to snag some hot Euro ass...

Who are we kidding? We all know Sid has no game! If he got any action it was from being Jordan Staal's wingman! And how good does Jordan Staal look? I haven't had these feelings since 2007. Its official, Jordan, you are my number one Staal brother! And hello Paul 'hot ginger' Martin! I had no idea he looked this good out of uniform. Also I just realized Maxime Talbot's cheese would totally work in France, he's getting the most action out of all of them! Play on player, play on!






They're on a yatch. Well played boys!

Staal vs Staal, Hall vs Staal, and a Geno hattrick!

Staal vs. Staal

Last night my boys, The Pens played the Rangers AKA Staal vs Staal. Luckily Sean Avery's a whiny bitch and is out with a hand injury.

A lot of lonely nights beating the stick, Avery??? Muahahahahaha

ANYWAYS, at the beginning you could tell both teams wanted it and they wanted it BAD however my boys quickly overpowered the Rangers, and pretty much owned this game. I kind of stopped watching the game for a bit because Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles were on, I flicked in between but srsly guys Terminator > Hockey.

Speaking of cyborgs, how good is Ty Conklin...like for real, who is this dude? where did he come from? why is he so good? and what came first the chicken or the egg? Conk, has been untouchable since replacing Marc-Andre, UNTOUCHABLE! He's nuts, insane, POSSESSED! I don't think I've seen a goalie this season that moves like him! When, and I mean, when the Penguins make the playoffs, Conk should defo be starting goalie (forget Marc-Andre, who's been inconsistent at best!) yes we all know his previous history of playoff uh performance, but there's no other goalie in the NHL that's as red hot as Conk, am I wrong?

Check out Sidney's face...L.O.L.

Who else was on fire, well besides the obvious, Sidney Crosby, MALKIN! Homeboy is totally sticking it to the fans who didn't vote for him for the all-star game, because he got his 2nd NHL hattrick last night, yea his second one in like a week/week and a half time span, take that HATERS!!!!!
The Pens walked away with a 4-1 victory, and the Rangers, in the dying seconds of the game, decided that since they couldn't win the game, maybe they should throw down, and win with a beat down! Adam Hall, and my boyfriend Marc Staal, got into it the most. It wasn't a fight exactly, Adam tried the whole jersey over the head thing (to which I screamed "Hey Hall, that's my job, step off my man!") but Marc got Adam into a bear hug and try as he might Hall could not get any good jabs in, OH MARC! He did manage to get of Marc's helmet, to reveal his ginger hair (tnawww) which I got really excited about and then realized that I'm lame.


So after last night's game, husband no. 5 is tied with Vincent Lecavalier for top points in the league. AND my boys, the Pens, are first place in the Atlantic Division...HECK YES!

What [Should Be] On My IPod: Jordan Staal

Upon discovering Jordan Staal's musical taste, I decided to put a little twist on this thing, and change it to "What SHOULD be on my Ipod', because Jordo listens to Keith Urban. Yes Keith Urban...I know, how embarrassing! I wasn't expecting him to be a huge fan of the Shins or anything, I mean he's a hockey player...from Thunder Bay for fuck's sake, but Keith Urban??? If we're going to listen to country music, it better be Johnny Cash or Townes Van Zant!

So here's a list there will change your life Jordo or at the very least get you more pootang because what girl doesn't like the deep sensitive artsy guy...especially one with your physique.

1)Interpol- Pioneer to the Falls
This song is pretty, dark, deep, and I'm not sure what its about but picture this Jordo: Parked in your SUV on a hill overlooking Pittsburgh, the lights of Steele town glistening, its cold out, Adriana Lima sitting in the passenger seat next to you, not knowing exactly how to proceed because apparently she's a virgin (BULLSHIT!) but she's giving you her famous bedroom eyes, what do you do??? You play the 'sensitive no one understands me, there's so much pressure on me' card(tell your Captain he can use this tactic as well) turn on "Pioneer to the Falls", Paul Banks apathetic voice along with the haunting rifts, and you're in dude, YOU'RE SO IN!

2)Johnny Cash- Walk the Line
This is a classic song, you have this on your ipod and it proves that you have great taste in music...besides the sluts who like to think they're cowgirls will think you're like so totally deep!

3)Regina Spektor- Samson
Play this song when you're about to do the nasty with a girl for the first time. This song is perfect. It's love. This song along with incense and candles that girl doesn't have a chance in hell!

4)Matthew Good Band- The Rat Who Would Be King
CAN CON!!!!!!!!!!!!! If this song doesn't break your heart Jordo, well then I have no idea what will! We girls can't resist a tortured soul, Sell it J. Staal and sell it hard!

5)The Arcade Fire- Neighborhood # 3 (power out)
This is how we music nerds get revved up. Listen to this song right before a game and I will guarantee you will score 5 goals and cure AIDS all in the same night...hey I believe in you, Jordo!

6)Leonard Cohen- Chelsea Hotel
"giving me head on the unmade bed" UM it doesn't get any more badass than that! L. Cohen has gotten more pootang than you ever will! Why? because he's a dream boat AND he's a fucking poet/artist/musician! Listen to him and you may come close...'may' being the operative word here!

7)The Fratellis- Flathead
Yes the song from the ipod commercial but you need a song to get lairy to and hey this is it! Rock out with your co -- err, you know when you and Colby Cheese get drunk and get into all kinds of mischief!

8)Mason Jennings- Godless
This song is AMAZING!!!!!!! I know you'll love it! Listen to this when you're so pissed off that you decide to drink your problems away like when I tell you I'm leaving you're ass for Sidney Crosby you'll go loco esse...but in that good therapeutic way!

9)U2- Where the streets have no name
Who doesn't like U2? C'mon now!

10)Radiohead- Street Spirit (fade out)
You need a song to sulk to and this is the best of the best! Besides you like Radiohead, that means you're cool, and everybody loves the cool kids! Especially girls, we all want to have a cool boyfriend!



Keith who?


PS good luck tonight, you'll need it! You're facing hottie townie and Husband no. 4 AKA Heater, don't piss your pants now, Jordo...and score please!

SEARS CATALOGUE!!!!!!

I don't know why I've never posted these, they're so fucking hilarious it hurts!!!!
WORK IT BOYS!!!!!!! (from the 2007 NHL awards)

The jacket over the shoulder, that's so Zach Morris of you Jordo!

'Don' quit your day job Sidney...no seriously, please don't...like for real, DON'T!!!

Hands on the hips, taking pointers from Paris Hilton, are we? PS nice shoes


Apparently mad hockey skillz, a rockin' bod, AND good looks can't mask the fact that Crosby's a HUGE nerd!!!

Date, Marry, Kill The Staal Brothers Edition: Incest is best!

The Staal brothers, the greatest genetic experiment to hit the NHL!!!! Not only do these boys have marketable mad hockey skills but they also have mad marketable looks! Spreads in GQ and Vogue homme are just around the corner, TRUST! Now lets' get on with the Staaling, shall we?

I'd date Marc Staal:

"Hey Marc, do the carpets match the curtains?" ;)

There's just something about Marc that awakens the maternal instinct in me; it could be his ginger hair, or that he's the brother we know the least about, or it could be the fact that he's exposed to a naked Sean Avery on a regular basis (exposure to a miro-penis must be traumatizing). Whatever it is, whenever there's mention of Ginge Staal an uncontrolled "tnawwwwwwww, Marc" escapes from my mouth, I don't know why, just does. Marc would be the best boyfriend out of all the NHL Staals (Sorry Jared, you've been excluded, what are you like, 12?) because I think he's the nicest; he'd give you flowers after you got your teeth cleaned at the dentist, would leave you the bigger piece of the pie, introduce you to his mother after your second date, hold your hair after you've taken 12 tequila shots, vomiting everywhere, and he'd probably hang out with you more than with 'his boys'. BUT no matter how nice Ginge is, I can't do nice. After a while I'd get sick of him always putting the seat down when he's done in the bathroom, and asking me about my feelings sorry Marc, its just not going to work out!

I'd marry Jordan Staal:



I'm like 100% sure that Penguins INC. AKA Mario, is pulling in all kinds of favours for the local newspapers, radio stations, and puck bunnies, not to spill the beans, because Jordo, is a party boy!!!! Abso-freaking-lutely, 100 % true, homeboy parties like a rock star!!!! But Jordan isn't a mindless frat ass hat, by day he's the fun guy, who most girls would think "omg Jordan would make SUCH a good boyfriend, like omg!!!!" he may make in appropriate jokes at times but overall Jordo is harmless and a sweet guy...that is until its pub night and its $4 dollars a pitcher! Homeboy is completely unrecognizable when you walk in, dancing like an ape, telling dirty jokes, yelling "I lurve thesssss sssssssong!" every 2 minutes, possibly a young Brian McGrattan, maybe? So why do I want to marry this fool? Well besides the fact that we have soooo much in common and we'd like totally be bff in real life, well:
a)He's super talented, hall of fame bound for sure!
b)When Jordo's passed out on the couch Marc and I could relive the glory days upstairs *wink* *wink*
c)Paternity wouldn't come into question because ginges are prevelant in both our families, so it would totally be possible for Jordo and I to make a ginge baby, Marc wouldn't even pop into his mind, heh...AHEM
d)Sidney Crosby would be our neighbour (he can come borrow some sugar anytime ;))
e)With his height and bone structure, and my eclectic genetic make up, and pretty gene our sons would be strapping young lads, while our daughters would be victoria secret-esque beauties
f) BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY Jordan will be soooooo hot when he gets older! Think he's good looking now wait till he's 35, old man hot is the best kind of hot!
Yes I would soooo marry Jordan Staal, how fun would that marriage be?

I'd kill Eric Staal:



Something's starting to change in the eldest of the brotherhood. He' still a kick ass player BUT I'm sensing an arrogance that was not there before, its mild, but still there...who do you think you are Eric, Sidney Crosby? OFF WITH HIS HEAD!

Rock 'em Sock 'em 87

Yeah Sidney!!! Kick His Ass!!!

Yesterday the bitches in blue lost to my boys, the pens 6-4. But I must admit they weren't horrible; they kept up with the pens for the most part. The one thing that the pens have that the bitches in blue don't have is synergy. They work well together, beautiful passes, someone's always there, ALWAYS, proven by the fact that the pens had about 30 more shots on net than the bitches in blue, which is sort of shameful, especially when its on home ice. However, the fact of the matter is, the penguins won, and Sidney AKA husband number 5, scored his first two goals of the season in my home town, clearly were meant to be...NOT! lol

I love how when Sidney was kicking Antropov's ass, these two teenaged girls directly behind them on the other side of the glass, started jumping up and down, squeeing and banging on the glass. I L.O.L.'ed. Sidney of course ignored them(or maybe he was just preoccupied with giving someone a beat down). Silly girls, don't they know the sex stare is much more effective, pfffftt amateurs!!!!! But I must say seeing him fight really put him over the top, this whole time I was convinced he was this pansy, but now Sidney is a man, SID THE KID IS A MAN!!!!!!!!!

You know who else is a man? My favourite Staal brother, Jordan!!! AND damn is he ever a good player! I'm convinced that if we ever met in real life we'd totally be like BFF and we'd totally drink Colby Armstrong under the table...yea I'm totally a loser and entertained such thoughts, WHATEVS!!!!!!!! I'm cool, you want me on your team, don't deny it!


PS don't worry this won't become a hockey blog. Hockey is my only form of entertainment whilst I'm locked up doing my readings and shit. But don't you worry accounts from the high drama that is my life will continue!