EW!

I wouldn't say that I am a shallow person, per se. I was brought up to have strong opinions and my mother came from a time and place where women were ladies, and always put together, so that does have an affect on me. I wouldn't say that I'm this prissy girly girl because I love my track pants but sometimes, arbitrary opinions spring up into my mind that are sometimes cruel and always blunt. So, when I saw this photo I threw up in my mouth a little bit. Now I don't know if that's because I'm feeling a little queezey this morning or if its because Mike Comrie is friggin' disgusting OR if its a combination of the two.


I haven't posted about these two in a while but I've been saying this forever ~*Hil*~ is waaay too good for this douche bag.

Forget the black on black, forget the unfortunate footwear; look at that face, the receding hairline, his extreme paleness which is borderline transparent, his unsophisticated gait. Pair that with the rumours circa 2007, of coke fueled parties in Ottawa, f*cking Elisha Cuthbert, and any puck bunny with an orange tan and fake tits, AND his mediocre hockey skills.

Now tell me, do you think they make a good couple? Do you think he's good enough for her?

I mean look at that picture, his face is melting, its f*cking MELTING. Plus he's a pro athlete what's with the bloat, Comire? Ugh, he is so not attractive in anyway, shape, or form.

PS Has anyone else noticed that ~*Hil's*~ hotness has seriously taken a nose dive since she's been with him.? Single ~*Hil*~ was the hottest ~*Hil*~.

PPS But his dad's mega rich, so I suppose no matter that he looks like an overweight, balding, hick who fixes septic tanks, she'll probably stay with him because he can afford to buy her $100 000 cars. Damn, the women's movement, where did we go wrong?

Yeah, okay

Apparently ~*Hil*~ Duff and Ryan Gosling exchanged phone numbers and were flirting at some Hollywood dive. Could it be? ~*Hil*~ cheating on Mike? Finally taking my advice? Realizing she could do better? Somehow I doubt that.

First off ~*Hil*~ has notoriously shit taste in guys. From Aaron Carter to Joel Madden( who has been made hot by Nicole Richie and baby Harlow, who knew) to a rumoured fling with that guy from the Hills who isn't Brody or Spencer to Mike Comrie, an 'almost good' hockey player 'has been'. Ryan Gosling does not compute.

Second off, I doubt ~*Hil*~ is Ryan's type. Ryan has dated Sandra Bullock, Rachel McAdams and possibly Kiki Dunst. ~*Hil*~ does not compute.

Third off her and dead beat bf were vacationing in the Bahamas this past weekend because Mike Comrie sucks and will never be an All Star, and they looked pretty into each other.

BUT

if this is true, well played Hilary, well played!

Note to annoying slags: if you were suuuuch good friends with ~*Hil*~ how come she didn't make it to your lame ass wedding? Hm.

So what's it doing for him?

We know that Dion's philandering has gotten him a video game cover but what of Mike Comrie? What's boinking Lizzie McGuire got him? Sure he's gotten floor tickets to an LA Lakers game (boo!!!! go Celtics !!!!!!!!!) but in terms of his career, of endorsement deals, of being one of the faces of hockey????? What is Mike Comrie getting out of this?

NADA, that's what!

I guess its entirely possible that, he loves ~*Hil*~ for ~*Hil*~, and that this relationship is completely selfless and giving, etc. etc. etc. But unfortunately the tooth fair doesn't exist, we don't go to care bare land when we die AND the good guys rarely win. Do not be fooled people, this is the era of who you date or how much you're photographed can help further your career. Their relationship is on public display, they want us to watch, to fantasize about weddings and babies, so that we'll buy their albums, their clothing lines, and so the calls keeping coming from various sponsors/designers/organizers.

9 times out of 10 when you see candids of a celeb, they or their people have called various agencies to catch them going ~*grocery shopping*~ or ~*buying lattes*~ or ~*walking their dog(s)*~. Nothing is an accident when it comes to Hollywood, and Mike and Hilary are no different. BUT unfortunately for Michael it seems that Gatorade/RBK/Nike-Bauer/Under Armour hell even the NHL itself doesn't give a damn that Mike Comrie is boinking the Duff.

Why?

Sorry Mike! You'll never get to stand beside Peyton Manning, EAT YOUR HEART OUT!!!

Probably because Mike had his shot for NHL stardom and fucked it up, probably in Edmonton, where he allegedly fucked someone's wife, but that's never been confirmed so who knows, right? *cough* Plus he's never developed into a standout player, sure on the New York Islanders he's the 2nd best player but guys its the New York Islanders, my delinquent little brother, the Toronto Maple Leafs, placed better than them! I'm pretty sure I'd be a star player on the NYI. When 2010 comes DO NOT be surprised when Steve Yzerman DOES NOT call Mike Comrie to be a part of Team Canada. I mean why would you want Comrie when you can have Crosby, Nash, Heatley, Richards, Staals (all 4), Spezza, Lecavalier, Doan, Keith, Green, Savard, St.Louis...do I need to go on?

But don't you fret, all you Mike + Hilary lovers, he'll never get rid of the Duff even if its doing nothing for his career, I mean could Mike do better than Hilary Duff??? Methinks not!!!! She'll definitely be doing the dumping! Which I hopes she does soon because she deserves so much better!

Perfection vs Beauty and the Beast

Last night was the MET Costume Institute Gala, its pretty much a useless event if you're a regular person BUT if you're in the fashion industry or a ~*celebrity*~ its a magical night of high fashion and trying to kiss ass all the way to your very own Vogue cover. So who showed up?

Gisele and Tom:


UGH! The most perfect of perfect couples. He's ridiculously hot, she's ridiculously hot. Imagine their sex tape, EPIC!!!! They are made for each other and I love it! I love how you couldn't come up with a more perfect couple if you tried: an NFL ~*star*~ quarterback AND the highest paid supermodel, UGH PERFECTION!!!!!!!! Don't they look amazing together? Her bod is out of this world, wouldn't you agree? Love them together, I hope they get married, then all my dreams for them will come true.

and then Mike and Hilary showed up:



Hilary's a very pretty girl. She's been pretty savvy with her career, steering away from photographic evidence of scandal and drugs, made a fortune at a very young age but has remained very grounded and dedicated to her fans. But Hilary's downfall is that she has shitty taste in men. First she dated Aaron Cater...Aaron Carter, guys!!!!!!!! Then she moved on to douche bag Joel Madden who by all accounts is responsible for her new ~*sound*~. And now its Mike 'douche bag home wrecking' Comrie. Let's get this straight, none, I repeat NONE of these guys deserve/deserved Hilary. Where she's at and where they're all at its like entirely different leagues.

Comrie's a douche! He's got it all over his face. Left Edmonton because he slept with one of his fellow team mates wives (very classy), started dating Elisha Cuthbert while in Ottawa (take note Dion!). Ottawa eventually got rid of him because he never developed into the player that everyone thought he would be. I don't understand why she goes for the douche bags! I mean look at her, gorgeous girl and look at Comrie...do you find him attractive? Do you find that attractive??? Damn, girl if you weren't going for looks couldn't you have at least gone on talent???? Comrie's past his prime; probably signed that deal with the Islanders because no one else was knocking on his door.

*Oh Hilary, if it weren't for your poor choice in men, I'd totally love you but alas it was not meant to be





*it may seem unfair to not like a person based on who they date BUT Hilary is selling her relationship to us. How else would the paparazzi always find them during their tender moments? Why else would she walk the red carpet with him, when he could have easily gone through the back entrance? Why else would she openly talk about him and their relationship to the media? Why else would she sit front row at his hockey games, when all other hockey wives/gfs sit in the box way at the top? Hilary's no Christian Bale or Gwenyth Paltrow or Rachel McAdams who very rarely talk about their personal life. She's selling it guys: Mike & Hilary 4eva!! but I'm not buying!

The Drought is OVER!!!!!!!!

My boys, the Pens, finally won a game! They beat Mike Comire and the Islanders, 3-2.

Yea Mike and I used to date way back in 2001, it was pretty serious you know! I wrote Nicole Comrie all over my notebooks, and would clip out all his pictures from the news paper, and in 8th period I would go down to the computer lab and stare at his picture on NHLPA, would decide what I would do with his compensation money, a yatch? 14 Herems bags? A house on the bridlepath? All of the above? But then I met Orlando Bloom and I broke it off with Mike. He seemed to take it pretty hard because he fell of the face of the earth for a while. Now he's dating Hilary Duff (who seems to have the same taste in douche bags as my 14 year old self ie Mike Comrie, Joel Madden, a dark period in my life, I know!) and now I'm banging everyone from Paul Newman circa 1980 to Caleb Followill! But still it feels good when husband no. 5 kicks the ex-boyfriend's ass!

ANYWAYS the loosing streak is over! ALL IS RIGHT IN THE WORLD !!! Things are looking up for husband no. 5 and the pens!!!!

Can you feel the love tonight?

Speaking of husband no. 5, wasn't it too cute that Sidney was more excited over Laraque's goal than he was???? Tnawwww, such a good Captain! I loved it when he jumped into his arms and they embraced for 2 full minutes (ok clearly I'm embellishing), my cold black heart melted!

I love Laraque, he has such a nice face and that voice, UGH, he can recite poetry to me anytime! And have you heard his laugh and the way he scrunches up his face, OH GEORGES! He'd totally be the guy to push you out of the way of a moving bus and on the 6 o'clock news with the headline 'hometown hero' he'd modestly say "I'm no hero! Just doing my part" but you are a hero Georges, you are!

Better watch out Crosby, Laraque could possibly usurp your throne and become husband no. 6! Send me 10 boxes of Doritios and I'll consider cementing your spot, but I dunno Laraque's smile...dude, I even you love him.