Thursday, August 21, 2008

Oh hai thar!

So the gossip world is going nuts over whether or not the Duff is engaged to New York Islander's Douche, Mike Comrie...except that she's not.

The ring she was seen with was not an engagement type of ring, if and when the time comes, Mike can afford something with a little more ice, ya know what I mean?

Hilary is a smart girl (or maybe her handlers are smart) because this girl has been in the game since childhood, she knows how to play, and she knows how to play it well. These days everyone's getting engaged, and having babies, and in Hollywood, that equates to endorsements and box office sales. ~*Hil*~ has a bunch of movies coming out, and will soon be releasing another greatest hits album (although I can't really figure out why), leaving Hollywood records and wants to continue on with her music career with another record company(why, oh god, why?), so she needs support, she needs people to buy her albums and tickets to her movies, she needs people to care about her because as it stands no one really cares about Hilary Duff.



Why would you pay attention to the Duff's grocery shopping routine when you can pay attention to Lindsay Lohan's hot lesbian affair or watch Ashlee Simpson's bump grow or fantasize over Blake Lively and Pen Badgley's relationship or guess which Jonas brother's done the dirty deed. Hell even Suri Cruise is waaaaay more interesting! Hilary's relevance is fading fast, and she knows it! That's why she's been working the red carpet with her ape boyfriend on her arm. But like I said, ~*Hil*~ is smart, she doesn't want to break away from her good girl image (whether that image is a true reflection of her, well, that's another story), so what do you do when the 'no panty upskirt' is out of the question, and pregnancy rumors are not an option? Why, you play the blushing-bride-to-be card, of course!



So smart!

Notice how there hasn't been any confirmations or rebuttals. ~*Hil*~ knows how this game works! Look, even I'm talking about it! We're starting to care guys, and we'll start to buy her albums, and go watch her movies, and sooner or later she'll be on par with Blake Lively and Lindsay Lohan. Just you watch guys! The media is a lot like politics...maybe that's why I love it so much!

But having said that, no one will care about ~*Hil*~ like we do about Britney, or Lindsay, or [presently] Sienna Miller. Scandal sells more than cotton candy clouds and happily ever after, that's why Hilary will always be 2nd fiddle, be in B-grade movies (at best), and never break any kind of record with her music (commercial or critical).

Will there be a wedding with Mike and ~*Hil*~? I wouldn't discount it, this girl did go out with Joel Madden for 2 yrs, and before that there was Aaron Carter. But I don't think it will be anytime soon.

I still think the Duff can do better than this loser, sure he's a pro athlete and comes from money but he's a huge douche, a so-so hockey player and is the 2nd son born to Bill Comrie, which means he isn't the heir apparent, which means he's 2nd in line, which means Paul will probably inherit mostly if not all of Bill's fortune and then sell the shares and make a shit load of money...looks like you chose the wrong brother ~*Hil*~.

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